It’s been a year since I’ve been working as a full-time administrative assistant. I recall feeling excited when I first started working because I had a reason to take care of and put myself together. I was ecstatic to create a new routine simply because I had somewhere to go and people to interact with. I styled my hair, wore cute outfits, prepared, and packed healthy breakfasts and lunches, and went to fitness classes right after work for the first few months.
However, after a few months, the new job wasn’t so new anymore. I got tired of going to the same place. Preparing and packing meals. Sitting in the same cubicle. Barely seeing anyone in the office. Spending time after work to exercise. I stopped taking care of and putting myself together. I barely combed my hair. I wore the same t-shirt, jeans, jacket, and shoes almost every day. I ate out a lot. I only went to a fitness class about 3-4 times a month. It was clear how I went from vibrant to dull within months.
One day, feeling lifeless, I looked at myself in the mirror after I got home from work. I asked, who are you and what are you doing? I looked at my messy hair, the dark circles around my eyes, the bags under my eyes, the acne breakouts on my face, what I was wearing, and everything else that stood out. I dropped a tear, then two, and eventually, had a breakdown.
I knew I had to start taking care of and putting myself together, but this time for my mind, body, and soul, and not for a special reason.
I started small to ease back into a healthy routine. I did one thing for myself a day, whether it was put on eye cream or eat a fruit a day. This time, I wasn’t trying to do it all at once, only to get tired of it, and for a reason other than for myself.
It’s been a year since I’ve been working as a full-time administrative assistant now and I can confidently say that I feel much more vibrant. I’m still a work in progress, but everything I used to do for a reason, I now simply do for myself.
Just this morning, as I leaned into the shoe cabinet to take out a pair of old shoes to wear to work, I saw a pair of new shoes I got a month ago. Initially, I thought, eh, I’ll wear those another day with a better outfit. After a moment, I though, again, but why, why not wear them today. So, I wore the new pair of shoes to work, and couldn’t be happier.
Being and doing what feels good to and for us doesn’t require a special reason or any reason at all.
Sometimes, we put off what we’d like to be and do just because we don’t have a reason, not realizing that it’s putting off our happiness and inner peace.
The very fact that we’re living is enough to style our hair, wear the cute outfit, go out and about, or whatever it is you’d like to be and do.
It’s for you. Your mind, body, and soul. Your happiness and inner peace.
With Love,
Jasmine